Back to School Doesn’t Look the Same to Everyone.

For some kids, back to school season brings excitement. New supplies, seeing friends again, and resuming sports and other activities. 

For others—especially neurodivergent and LGBTQ+ kids—it can feel like bracing for a storm.

Kids who don’t fit into neurotypical or heteronormative boxes may be dreading:

• Masking all day to survive socially, then melting down at home

• Panicking over using the bathroom due to gender dysphoria

• Fearing bullying or being outed

• Struggling to keep up with executive functioning demands

• Dreading loud cafeterias, bright classrooms, or rigid schedules

• Navigating social rejection, gender policing, or feeling misunderstood by adults

Step 1: Validate

Instead of jumping into solutions or trying to minimize their fear, start by validating their experience—because it’s not being dramatic or overreacting. It’s a nervous system anticipating real harm.

Step 2: Preparation

How can you help your child prepare in ways that matches or complements their brain? Sometimes visual schedules, social stories, and sensory plans can help give a sense of preparation to the unknown. Let your child lead where they can.

Step 3: Collaboration

Advocate for gender-affirming practices, flexible learning, quiet spaces, testing accommodations—whatever it is that can help your child succeed and feel comfortable. Additional help-seeking can also be helpful, such as therapy for them, support groups for you, community spaces, etc.—because your child deserves affirming support and so do you!

Step 4: Practice Co-Regulating

The beginning and end of the day can be hard. Create and practice a simple check-in ritual or create a sensory reset space for decompression. 

Back to school might not look the same for everyone, including your child, but it does present an opportunity to support our kids thoughtfully and teach them skills to help them succeed and find balance in the world. Your child is so lucky to have you on their team!